InsaneJournal

If you look at me what you'll see is blemished skin, tired eyes made to look more tired by the eye-bags caused by sleeping late until early morning, or on occasion, having fun. You'll see a smoker who is dependent on cigarettes to get through days or moments of frustration, a former pain-killer addict who writes poetry at random times ranging from 12 midnight to 2 in the afternoon. You'll hear a chatty dude, with nothing to say, and sometimes everything to say, but who ends up eerily quiet after a few minutes of talking and then there will be awkwardness, but it's not awkward for me, just for you probably. You'll see a person who routinely regrets whatever he says either 10 seconds after he says it, or 10 hours, or even 10 days. You'll see someone who hates to smile, but smiles non-stop, because he can't control it. You'll see someone whose life is always a wrestling match between his controlling mother and some higher being versus himself. You'll see someone who makes decisions on the fly, or makes decision making a long, painstaking task. Look closer and you'll see a frustrated artist, an unsure writer (?), a disinterested person.

But despite all that negativity, sometimes you'll see someone who likes to live, even if he's killing himself with his bad habits and cynicism. Then, maybe, that's when you see the real version of me.

I like to write--I'm a junior with a journalism major, I write poetry on the side and fiction too. I love fanfiction. LOVE LOVE LOVE. Someday I want to get published, along with traveling the world, (including the North and South Pole, and Africa), being a professor, and other such ambitions. But while I'm trying to get to those lofty things, I routinely write random, perhaps sometimes vaguely annoying things like my fanfiction, slash fanfiction, fanart, pictures both SFW and NSFW, daily rants and some of my f-locked dirty laundry. Oh yeah, I do rant a lot--but only when I need some sort of help/advice from it, otherwise I go rant on another journal.

Other than writing I also like art. I do art! (or something that pathetically tries to be art) I love photography, and sketching. Inclusively, I make clothes for fun! I'm a cosplayer. And the thing about cosplaying? You make the clothes yourself (usually) and it ends up pretty awesome or awesomely horrible depending on your skills.

I love music!I play the piano a lot and love to synthesize music.

Oh, and I also cuss a lot. And repeat phrases and certain words to a degree that may find you wanting to slam the keyboard several times in irritation. :)

Friend or de-friend as you please, comment or don't comment, lurk or don't lurk as you please. (But it would better if you said something!) Also, feel free to add me up on Yahoo!messenger, or MSN Chat, googlespeak, or even e-mail me.